![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
Title: "Summers of a lifetime"
Author![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-userinfo.gif)
the_milky_way
Character(s)/Pairing: Dean Winchester (Sam/Dean)
Theme: Dean Winchester: A Year to Survive
Prompt(s): 26. Summer
Rating: PG-13
Words: 1.367
Disclaimer: Characters belong to Kripke and Warner. I don't own anything.
Warnings: slight spoilers for the entire show
Beta: Thanks for the beta reading and suggestions,silverraven
Summary: Summer means so much to him that it just seems natural that every single thing that means something to Dean happened and still happens during it.
Summer is when things happen.
It’s always been like this and Dean can’t decide when it started. Doesn’t really know for sure anyway. It’s just always been like this. Started probably way before he was even born. With his dad meeting his mom at the beginning of summer, proposing to her right in the middle of it, having him, Sammy and the family all together for one summer only. It just continued and never stopped from then on. Summer is the time when things get decided, get solved, get pushed back to never be spoken about again.
Summer is the time when their lives change.
For Dean, summer is the time where he learns things, where he gets things. Things that will for all time define his life. Things that he never really thought about but that were suddenly there. Summer was, and sometimes still is, the time where Dean comes close to settling into something resembling ‘normal’. It never really is but Dean always takes what he can get.
***
At first summer turns into the time when John can train them most efficiently. Always finding places with not much rain, no snow, no problems in getting into houses or motels. It is the time with no crying children because of the cold or the flu or Sammy shivering so much that he can’t sleep at all. John can get them to squat somewhere without much hassle.
Then summer becomes ideal because it’s the time they don’t have to fear being tracked down by CPS due to missing days at school. Free time, time to travel and hunt and train them even more. Sam starts to slip away, to escape any chance he gets and Dean always makes sure he’s close.
The sun beating down on them always means helping Sammy through drills and letting him lie in the shadows when John isn’t looking. Later, it also means following Sammy into libraries and archives and relaxing at the feel of cool, air conditioned currents on his skin. It means lying to John about it, too. But seeing Sam happy and relaxed takes priority over everything else one summer Dean’s trying not to think about.
Because later, summer also means trying not look too much or think too hard. It means trying to hold back when Sammy suddenly turns into Sam and leaves him confused and angry as hell, more then once. Angry with himself, with the world, the fucked up way they grew up, sometimes even with their dad and Sam’s new attitudes.
Then the heat has Dean trying not to notice that Sam is looking as well. Subtle ways of touching turns into heated battles of will. Back and forth, push and pull. They are on the same line, on the same edge but neither of them takes the one final step needed to be pushed over it.
Sun-baked skin, freckles, sweat soaked t’s and cut off jeans whenever they can get away with them. That’s what summer is for Dean. He can never pinpoint the moment when looks that are hotter than the sun, insecure touches during the night, cool sheets wrapped around them when John isn’t there, becomes his world. The heat is all consuming, between their bodies, on their skin. Until it isn’t anymore.
Summer never was something perfect or bad. But, to Dean, it never was a time to be spent alone. Never… until Sammy is gone. Then, summer is one of the loneliest times of the year Dean can think of. All four of them are spent on the road, the first one still with John, every other alone and searching for distraction.
Sam’s gone and the sun can beat down as much as it wants to, Dean’s always feeling cold.
***
Dean gets Sam back when the sun is still high in the sky, when the metal of the Impala is burning against his skin and the leather of the bench seat makes him feel like he’s melting.
His heart is in his throat when he risks a look and Sam’s there, right there. Hair plastered against his forehead, sweat dripping down, pooling at his neck - grumbling and twisting to get out of his layers.
Sam’s just there. Back.
Dean feels the heat, the sun, the burning on his skin and in his chest like he hasn’t in years.
Sam’s smile, when it comes, is real. It burns Dean more than the sun ever could and he knows Sam can see it, too. Dean knows it’s still there, the heat, the burn, the flame that will one day send him to hell.
They both know it.
They both can feel it.
***
They lose Dad in summer.
***
Sam spends a summer in hell, when Dean’s literally there. They don’t talk about it for a long time but Dean knows this summer will be the worst one between them.
***
Dean loses Sam again when the sun’s merciless and all he can feel is his blood burning hot on his skin, along with his tears and the look Sam – Sam, not Lucifer – sends him in this last second.
It takes a year, another summer for Dean to have it all back in his life again.
***
Dean’s greasy with oil from the Impala, sweat’s running down his back and his t-shirt is a lost cause. They are parked at the side of the road, in the middle of a hunt and the sun is hiding behind the trees. Twilight more than anything but still hot as hell.
Sam’s laying on the grass, arm over his eyes, inching his way along with the moving shadow on the ground. Dean grins, shakes his head and thinks that this is kind of perfect.
The middle of summer, they are on the road, together still, after everything.
Dean feels the slight breeze of movement before Sam’s at his side. The tension between them, the one from all those summers ago, the one that never vanished, is there. Thick and heavy, hot and angry. It’s been stronger ever since Sam got his soul back.
It feels like Sam remembers it all now again and he is stringing Dean along. And Dean’s not even trying to fight it. It has been years since a summer felt like this and he’ll be dammed if he doesn’t take what’s presented to him.
The looks are back, the subtle touches and the smiles.
And now Sam’s pressed against him, hands on Dean’s hips, lips gently moving along heated, sweat-slick skin. It’s so new, so unexpected, that Dean freezes. Just for a second. A second in which he can enjoy just feeling Sam this close, feeling Sam being there, being with him.
When Dean turns the sun casts a halo around them, around Sam, and Dean thinks it fits.
“Dean.”
One word and it means everything. It’s a question, an answer, an admission and a permission. Dean takes it all for what it is, Sam telling him it’s okay. That it’s finally okay.
Sam’s lips are warm against his. Not hot, not burning but warm and perfect and home.
***
Dean tells Sam he loves him when the sun is the highest in the sky and the earth is burned brown beneath them. Dean tells Sam that he is his world when they are both pressed, sweaty and sated against the burning leather of the Impala’s backseat.
Sam tells him the same just a second later.
***
Smoldering heat, melting against the hot leather of the Impala’s seat, burning his skin against the overheated metal of the car. All that has been a constant in his life since he can remember. It’s so much a part of his life that he can’t think of another way to spend his summers anymore.
The sun glaring through the dusty windshield, Dad at the wheel, Sammy snuggled up against him despite them both dripping with sweat. It’s all there, in his head, his heart, in his memories. And there will be new ones as well.
Summer means so much to him that it just seems natural that every single thing that means something to Dean happened and still happens during it.
Author
the_milky_wayCharacter(s)/Pairing: Dean Winchester (Sam/Dean)
Theme: Dean Winchester: A Year to Survive
Prompt(s): 26. Summer
Rating: PG-13
Words: 1.367
Disclaimer: Characters belong to Kripke and Warner. I don't own anything.
Warnings: slight spoilers for the entire show
Beta: Thanks for the beta reading and suggestions,
silverravenSummary: Summer means so much to him that it just seems natural that every single thing that means something to Dean happened and still happens during it.
Summer is when things happen.
It’s always been like this and Dean can’t decide when it started. Doesn’t really know for sure anyway. It’s just always been like this. Started probably way before he was even born. With his dad meeting his mom at the beginning of summer, proposing to her right in the middle of it, having him, Sammy and the family all together for one summer only. It just continued and never stopped from then on. Summer is the time when things get decided, get solved, get pushed back to never be spoken about again.
Summer is the time when their lives change.
For Dean, summer is the time where he learns things, where he gets things. Things that will for all time define his life. Things that he never really thought about but that were suddenly there. Summer was, and sometimes still is, the time where Dean comes close to settling into something resembling ‘normal’. It never really is but Dean always takes what he can get.
***
At first summer turns into the time when John can train them most efficiently. Always finding places with not much rain, no snow, no problems in getting into houses or motels. It is the time with no crying children because of the cold or the flu or Sammy shivering so much that he can’t sleep at all. John can get them to squat somewhere without much hassle.
Then summer becomes ideal because it’s the time they don’t have to fear being tracked down by CPS due to missing days at school. Free time, time to travel and hunt and train them even more. Sam starts to slip away, to escape any chance he gets and Dean always makes sure he’s close.
The sun beating down on them always means helping Sammy through drills and letting him lie in the shadows when John isn’t looking. Later, it also means following Sammy into libraries and archives and relaxing at the feel of cool, air conditioned currents on his skin. It means lying to John about it, too. But seeing Sam happy and relaxed takes priority over everything else one summer Dean’s trying not to think about.
Because later, summer also means trying not look too much or think too hard. It means trying to hold back when Sammy suddenly turns into Sam and leaves him confused and angry as hell, more then once. Angry with himself, with the world, the fucked up way they grew up, sometimes even with their dad and Sam’s new attitudes.
Then the heat has Dean trying not to notice that Sam is looking as well. Subtle ways of touching turns into heated battles of will. Back and forth, push and pull. They are on the same line, on the same edge but neither of them takes the one final step needed to be pushed over it.
Sun-baked skin, freckles, sweat soaked t’s and cut off jeans whenever they can get away with them. That’s what summer is for Dean. He can never pinpoint the moment when looks that are hotter than the sun, insecure touches during the night, cool sheets wrapped around them when John isn’t there, becomes his world. The heat is all consuming, between their bodies, on their skin. Until it isn’t anymore.
Summer never was something perfect or bad. But, to Dean, it never was a time to be spent alone. Never… until Sammy is gone. Then, summer is one of the loneliest times of the year Dean can think of. All four of them are spent on the road, the first one still with John, every other alone and searching for distraction.
Sam’s gone and the sun can beat down as much as it wants to, Dean’s always feeling cold.
***
Dean gets Sam back when the sun is still high in the sky, when the metal of the Impala is burning against his skin and the leather of the bench seat makes him feel like he’s melting.
His heart is in his throat when he risks a look and Sam’s there, right there. Hair plastered against his forehead, sweat dripping down, pooling at his neck - grumbling and twisting to get out of his layers.
Sam’s just there. Back.
Dean feels the heat, the sun, the burning on his skin and in his chest like he hasn’t in years.
Sam’s smile, when it comes, is real. It burns Dean more than the sun ever could and he knows Sam can see it, too. Dean knows it’s still there, the heat, the burn, the flame that will one day send him to hell.
They both know it.
They both can feel it.
***
They lose Dad in summer.
***
Sam spends a summer in hell, when Dean’s literally there. They don’t talk about it for a long time but Dean knows this summer will be the worst one between them.
***
Dean loses Sam again when the sun’s merciless and all he can feel is his blood burning hot on his skin, along with his tears and the look Sam – Sam, not Lucifer – sends him in this last second.
It takes a year, another summer for Dean to have it all back in his life again.
***
Dean’s greasy with oil from the Impala, sweat’s running down his back and his t-shirt is a lost cause. They are parked at the side of the road, in the middle of a hunt and the sun is hiding behind the trees. Twilight more than anything but still hot as hell.
Sam’s laying on the grass, arm over his eyes, inching his way along with the moving shadow on the ground. Dean grins, shakes his head and thinks that this is kind of perfect.
The middle of summer, they are on the road, together still, after everything.
Dean feels the slight breeze of movement before Sam’s at his side. The tension between them, the one from all those summers ago, the one that never vanished, is there. Thick and heavy, hot and angry. It’s been stronger ever since Sam got his soul back.
It feels like Sam remembers it all now again and he is stringing Dean along. And Dean’s not even trying to fight it. It has been years since a summer felt like this and he’ll be dammed if he doesn’t take what’s presented to him.
The looks are back, the subtle touches and the smiles.
And now Sam’s pressed against him, hands on Dean’s hips, lips gently moving along heated, sweat-slick skin. It’s so new, so unexpected, that Dean freezes. Just for a second. A second in which he can enjoy just feeling Sam this close, feeling Sam being there, being with him.
When Dean turns the sun casts a halo around them, around Sam, and Dean thinks it fits.
“Dean.”
One word and it means everything. It’s a question, an answer, an admission and a permission. Dean takes it all for what it is, Sam telling him it’s okay. That it’s finally okay.
Sam’s lips are warm against his. Not hot, not burning but warm and perfect and home.
***
Dean tells Sam he loves him when the sun is the highest in the sky and the earth is burned brown beneath them. Dean tells Sam that he is his world when they are both pressed, sweaty and sated against the burning leather of the Impala’s backseat.
Sam tells him the same just a second later.
***
Smoldering heat, melting against the hot leather of the Impala’s seat, burning his skin against the overheated metal of the car. All that has been a constant in his life since he can remember. It’s so much a part of his life that he can’t think of another way to spend his summers anymore.
The sun glaring through the dusty windshield, Dad at the wheel, Sammy snuggled up against him despite them both dripping with sweat. It’s all there, in his head, his heart, in his memories. And there will be new ones as well.
Summer means so much to him that it just seems natural that every single thing that means something to Dean happened and still happens during it.
![[identity profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/openid.png){kind=small}
no subject
Date: 2011-04-15 04:28 pm (UTC)From:no subject
Date: 2011-04-15 05:03 pm (UTC)From:Thank you. I had this idea and it's good to know that it worked out.
Thanks again. :)
no subject
Date: 2011-04-15 07:41 pm (UTC)From:“Dean.”
One word and it means everything. It’s a question, an answer, an admission and a permission.
Just lovely!
no subject
Date: 2011-04-15 08:09 pm (UTC)From:no subject
Date: 2011-04-15 09:59 pm (UTC)From:no subject
Date: 2011-04-16 03:21 am (UTC)From:Absolutely beautiful and perfect. But I think this is actually my favorite part:
The sun glaring through the dusty windshield, Dad at the wheel, Sammy snuggled up against him despite them both dripping with sweat.
Man, really well done. This is lovely and it flows beautifully. I can definitely feel summer in it. And it made me really consider what Dean's life must've been like before the show. Which is good, and I probably shouldn't have to wait for fic to come along to make me think about it.
no subject
Date: 2011-04-16 09:32 am (UTC)From:I'm so relieved that this works. I somehow had the feeling that it wasn't very coherent. :)
<33
no subject
Date: 2011-04-16 09:32 am (UTC)From:♥
no subject
Date: 2011-04-16 09:33 am (UTC)From:♥
no subject
Date: 2011-04-16 09:36 am (UTC)From:Thank you.
I'm glad to know that the feelings are coming through.
I think the show gives some lovely glances into their past but sometimes it's not enough. I like to take fic and think about how it could have been like this. :)
no subject
Date: 2011-04-16 10:38 am (UTC)From:no subject
Date: 2011-04-17 12:18 pm (UTC)From:no subject
Date: 2011-04-21 09:53 am (UTC)From:no subject
Date: 2011-04-21 04:50 pm (UTC)From:For Dean, summer is the time where he learns things, where he gets things. Things that will for all time define his life. Things that he never really thought about but that were suddenly there. Summer was, and sometimes still is, the time where Dean comes close to settling into something resembling ‘normal’. It never really is but Dean always takes what he can get.
I really like this, like a lot. <3
no subject
Date: 2011-04-22 02:10 am (UTC)From:no subject
Date: 2011-04-22 12:15 pm (UTC)From:no subject
Date: 2011-04-22 12:15 pm (UTC)From:no subject
Date: 2011-04-22 12:15 pm (UTC)From:no subject
Date: 2011-04-22 01:20 pm (UTC)From:no subject
Date: 2011-04-22 02:54 pm (UTC)From:no subject
Date: 2011-04-23 05:10 pm (UTC)From:no subject
Date: 2011-04-23 08:53 pm (UTC)From:no subject
Date: 2011-04-30 12:51 am (UTC)From:whitejadeblack
no subject
Date: 2011-04-30 12:22 pm (UTC)From:To be honest, I wouldn't even know how to write RoboSam. It's not that I don't like him (which I sometimes do) but I don't have any clue how to portray that, so I'll keep away from it. And yes, it wouldn't have fit here... :)
Thank you for reading and the comment. :)
no subject
Date: 2011-05-15 11:46 pm (UTC)From:no subject
Date: 2011-05-16 10:27 am (UTC)From:I'm happy that this worked for you. :)
no subject
Date: 2011-11-10 04:29 pm (UTC)From:My heart is melting *_* (fits, doesn't it? XD) no, but it's beautiful!
And this:
“Dean.”
One word and it means everything. It’s a question, an answer, an admission and a permission.
The only word spoken in the story and it hits the spot! This story is so precious and so pure. And you can feel Dean's emotions dripping off the words. It's beautiful, I'm going to save it to my computer, so I won't lose it <333
Your writing is amazing!
no subject
Date: 2011-11-11 06:09 pm (UTC)From:So glad to see that you liked it.
And I kinda like this little piece as well.
♥
Thank you!